There are well over 100 scriptures on loving our wives in the Bible. One of the main scriptures often quoted when referring to loving our wives is Ephesians 5:25 – “Husbands love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
Although this is certainly applicable as the ultimate sacrifice and a wonderful example for us, it seems there is much more to think through relating to this scripture.
First, it’s important to explore a more in-depth look at this verse on the question, how did Jesus Love the church in addition to his ultimate sacrifice?
The church is defined not as bricks and mortar but by the people. So, we need to explore How Christ Loved the People and then apply that to Loving our Wives.
Christ showed love towards the church (the people) in many ways, here are just a few.
- Jesus provided for their physical needs – Jesus loved the church (the people) and provided food for them on many occasions as the great provider – Matthew (14: 13-21) is just one example of being a provider. We must show love to our wives by being a good provider. Working hard consistently at our jobs, being a good father and helpful attentive husbands.
- Jesus was Encouraging & Uplifting – Jesus loved the church (his people) by constantly encouraging them. The New Testament is full of encouragement to the people reflecting many instances where Jesus showed love to the church (the people) through encouragement. (1 Thessalonians 4:18), (Romans 15:5.) Men we can show great love towards our wives by being a constant source of encouragement, attempting to uplift our wives throughout each day in a conscious deliberate effort.
- Jesus was inspiring – Jesus loved the church (his people) by inspiring them. Christ inspired the church with hope and love and grace. (Philippians 4:7) (Mark 10:27) (Psalms 37: 23-24) Inspiring our wives in their work, their faith, their friendships, their interest, hobbies, parenting etc. are all ways we can love our wives through inspirational means.
- Jesus Demonstrates Spiritual Leadership – Jesus loved the church (the people) by guiding them spiritually. (John 10:27) He loved the church (the people) by being patient and tenderly leading the body of Christ (Ephesians 4: 15-16) Men we are called to Love our wives just as Jesus loved the church and lead our wives spiritually. (Ephesians 5: 21-23) We are to love our wives and be patient lovingly leading them and our families, as did the ultimate example, Jesus Christ
These are only a few examples of the ways Christ loved the church. (the people) With corresponding examples of how we as men can and should love our wives. Most importantly and the point of this story is this:
Even if our wives choose not to show us how God intended for them to love us, we as husbands must rise above our feelings and continue to Love our Wives. We cannot be concerned about how we might feel, that our wives may be neglecting us physically, sexually, or emotionally. We must stay the course focus on being obedient to God and practice how God calls us to treat and love our wives as husbands. (1 Peter 3:7) (Ephesians 5:25-28) It is our responsibility to love our wives as God commands us as men.
When we concentrate on loving our wives rather than how our wives are treating us, God will honor our obedience in many ways (John 14:21) including and especially how our wives will love us back. But if for some reason (and God only knows that reason) our wives choose not to love us back the way God intended, that is between them and the Lord and not for us to understand this side of heaven.
The more we dive deeper into scripture the more it teaches us How to Love our Wives as Christ loved the church. Take the dive today!