Romans 12:10 (NLT)
Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.
Affection is vitally important to your wife. It is among her greatest needs she has from her husband. In fact, in Willard Harley’s excellent book, His Needs, Her Needs, he lists affection as the number one need of a wife.
I am speaking of affection period, not affection that leads to a sexual experience. In every survey I have studied, affection is at the top of most lists of women’s needs. Affection is lovingly touching your wife. It might be a kiss, a hug, a massage, caressing her or touching her in a way that says, “I care about you.” Sometimes that affection does lead to a sexual experience, but this kind of affection should be demonstrated just to express your love to your wife with no other agenda.
Paul tells us to love each other with genuine affection. You are showing affection because you genuinely care about her and want her to tangibly know it. Affection brings a sense of security and joy to your wife when she knows you are expressing it just to show her you love her. It is saying, “I love you,” with your hands, with your body.
5 Ways To Show Affection to Your Wife
- Hug her. There are multiple benefits physically, emotionally, relationally, and mentally to hugging your wife.
- Kiss her when you leave the house and kiss her when you come home and any time in between. Never lose the power of a passionate kiss.
- Sit close to her when possible. Take the initiative to get physically close to your wife.
- Hold her hand when walking or while in the car. What an incredible testimony when an older couple still holds hands as they walk together.
- Cuddle with her, give her a massage, and ask her what you can do physically to assure her of your love and commitment. There is something about the physical closeness that brings you together emotionally and mentally.
C.S. Lewis said: “Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives.”
A man seeking counsel from Dr. George W. Crane, the psychologist, confided that he hated his wife, and intended to divorce her. “I want to hurt her all I can,” he declared firmly .“Well, in that case,” said Dr. Crane, “I advise you to start showering her with compliments. When she thinks you love her devotedly, then start the divorce action. That is the way to hurt her.” Some months later the husband returned to report that all was going well. He had followed the suggested course. “Good,” said Dr. Crane. “Now’s the time to file for divorce.” “Divorce!” the man said indignantly. “Never. I love my wife dearly!” (Bits & Pieces, August 22, 1991).